Lane Everett Abshire explained to me his dating frustrations. He is tired of the girls who want to do the same city stuff over and over again. He doesn’t mind a movie or a concert now and then, but the girls who want to stay indoors rather than going out and exploring life do not make his world go round. He prefers an outdoorsy adventurous girl.
Be careful what you wish for. If your woman has a macho side to her, chances are, like me she is a little pig-headed and stubborn-minded. We really don’t rely on the knight in shining armour and we can kick his butt too. Some may see her as a ball buster but if you truly love her, you’ll appreciate her strength, determination and spunk. She will challenge you. She will frustrate you, but she will, without a doubt, add more fun and excitement to your romance than any woman on earth could do. So brace yourself. You are in for the ride of your life.
Short of starting some sort of braapin’ dating site, there really is no solution to finding these kick-arse chicks. You need to help create your dream girl.
Some qualities to look for are as follows:
Spunk. She must have spunk and a sense of sassiness that tells you when the going gets tough she will dig in and get ’er done.
Dirt. She will not be a prissy woman. She will get dirty, be it wrenching or riding, and love every minute of it.
Muscles. She will have a physical strength about her to meet all the demands powersports and outdoor fun bring on. Compliment her on her muscles. Macho chicks dig that. I have a habit of flexing for my kids and my husband from time to time. I love feeling like the incredible mamma Hulk.
Independence. She will have her own or want her own ride. Not satisfied with leftovers, your spunky braaap monster will bond with her machine, fishing rod and chainsaw. Get used to it. Remember you asked for it.
She will have her own opinions and ideas and will express them. Work with it, for the both of you together will be a power team of awesome.
She will not be left behind. She will want to ride as much as possible and may get hurt feelings when left behind for a guys' weekend. You may, at this point, be her only riding buddy. Encourage her to ride with other women as well, who may, in fact, take her away on her own girl weekends as you bond with your boys.
Fireball macho girls have little patience for pansy men. If you insist upon watching The Notebook so you can sob in each other's arms, “sharing feelings” constantly, or being overly clingy, you probably should not seek this type of woman. I’ve had long talks with my daughter about this one. She is 17 and had a hilarious experience dating a boy whose greatest stress in life was wearing clothes that didn’t match or his hair not being exactly right. She snowmobiled down a mountain every day and he complained about her helmet hair at school. See ya sucka—you don’t deserve my hot-tempered, beautiful fireball of a daughter.
Don’t expect skirts and lots of makeup. I enjoy getting dressed up now and then, but to try to pull off the ultra-hip and fly-girly girl look—well, I end up feeling like some sort of a cross dresser. I remember a time I put on a skirt with boots. I came out and my husband burst out laughing.
“Honey, you are beautiful just the way you are. Don’t wear that. Please,” he said. I was mad. Why can all the other girls on the planet wear skirts and boots, but I can’t? Then I looked in the mirror. Yeah, let’s just say it didn’t quite suit me.
Things to consider before jumping in:
It will cost more. Riding for two is definitely more expensive than footing the bill for a single rider. You get a turbo, she wants a turbo. You get a new sled, you bet your babkas she doesn’t want to simply settle for your leftovers.
She will be hot-headed and may lose her stuff as she’s learning. This is a good thing. Breathe deep and flirt with her while teaching. She’ll calm down and you’ll be the hero. Win-win.
Her idiosyncrasies at home will transfer out to the playground as well. If she loses the car keys at home for God’s sake, don’t give her the sled keys on your trip away from home. The flip side of that is true too—all the little things that bug her about you at home will surface when you are riding together. You both need to learn how to draw a boundary and not bring home crap. It will defeat the purpose of playing.
Super passion. Riding will bring more passion into your relationship. The adrenalin-filled moments of riding will spill into your most intimate encounters. You are building strength and awesome each time you do choose to go sledding, biking and ATVing together.
Is it worth it? I think so. To me it is a blessing to share everything with my husband. He believes in my toughness and helps encourage all our kids to ride to their heart's content. Silly boys—braapin’ isn’t just for boys anymore!